Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Random state of unhappiness and anger

Today is the crappiest day ever ... in my life. I can't believe it how crappy it could be. I guess worse things are yet to come.


Main Entry: choice
Pronunciation: 'chois
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English chois, from Old French, from choisir to choose, of Germanic origin; akin to Old High German kiosan to choose -- more at CHOOSE
1 : the act of choosing : SELECTION
2 : power of choosing : OPTION

Main Entry: op·tion
Pronunciation: '├Ąp-sh&n
Function: noun
Etymology: French, from Latin option-, optio free choice; akin to Latin optare to choose
1 : an act of choosing
2 a : the power or right to choose : freedom of choice b : a privilege of demanding fulfillment of a contract on any day within a specified time c : a contract conveying a right to buy or sell designated securities, commodities, or property interest at a specified price during a stipulated period; also : the right conveyed by an option d : a right of an insured person to choose the form in which payments due on a policy shall be made or applied

Main Entry: free·dom
Pronunciation: 'frE-d&m
Function: noun
1 : the quality or state of being free: as a : the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action b : liberation from slavery or restraint or from the power of another : INDEPENDENCE c : the quality or state of being exempt or released usually from something onerous (choice of freedom)

There is no such thing as freedom of choice or freedom per se. A choice has got no freedom. Even the meaning of freedom in itself is an oxymoron. I especially refer to this sentence the 'absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action'. What bulls.

Why do I write that? Because no matter what happens, when you make a choice, there is responsibilities. And with responsibilities, there is constraint and necessity ... a choice can never be free, a person can never taste freedom.

I am upset and unhappy therefore I am angry. Or is it the other way round? Or maybe just all three.

The only way to obtain utter freedom is a. to die. b. to be extremely rich and build yourself a castle with a moat at the top of the mountains, grow poison ivy around the walls and place wild creatures to guide your borders. heh.

I'm upset because something happened today which made me realised that this is an extremely unfair and cruel and heartless organisation/world. And my freedom actually lies in the hands of stupid morons. I am again reminded of how much I actually hate people. See: I wrote down: dislikes - humans

*sigh* ... so what can be done now? I have bought a canister of Pringles - spicy cajun. Have to learn: anger management and believe in: being resigned and hopelessness, and acheive: state of non-broodingness and non-thinkingness.

Main Entry: in·tel·li·gence
Pronunciation: in-'te-l&-j&n(t)s
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Middle French, from Latin intelligentia, from intelligent-, intelligens intelligent
1 a (1) : the ability to learn or understand or to deal with new or trying situations : REASON; also : the skilled use of reason (2) : the ability to apply knowledge to manipulate one's environment or to think abstractly as measured by objective criteria (as tests)

I've also read somewhere that a person with high IQ is one who can adapt very easily.

Me? Then must be of a low intelligence. I find it extremely hard to adapt. I am going to suffer from withdrawal symptomes for a while.

a. It takes too long for the next Naruto episode.
b. I will be very slightly less busy officially as of Monday and I'll be suffering from all the extra time I have.
c. I have become overly materialistic and the absense of a certain important factor is going to give me some heartache.
d. I still have not come to terms with what happened today.

Thought of the day: Oh boy, is it a crappy day today or is it just me? I refuse to change my mindset therefore it is a crappy day today.


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