Monday, June 28, 2004


Hmmm ... I'm feeling, what's that word to describe? mixed feelings -- confused, slightly unhappy, a bit guilty, a bit down, pensive, 'puff out your cheeks' feeling.

I felt that it was a little bit my fault, for being on the side of the parent initially, and for falling for the usual 'listening to one-sided only' reason. Never ever ever believe everything a child says. I wonder if I'm simply too gullible. But on the other hand, I empathize with the kid and parent too. Imagine having to go for training four times a week everyday, gosh, that sounds ... painful. But ... and the big butt it is ... the younger generation are indeed getting softer. I don't know what to think now. The person was treated kind of an 'outcast' because of his different methods, and I'm feeling guilty for listening too much to the general gossip too, whether intentional or not. It's true, sometimes it's indeed much better to be 'blur' about things around you. Which was probably why I used to be much happier too. And it's really awful to be caught in the middle. People are so unreasonable and so thoughtless nowadays. *sigh* Every single thing also want to complain.

*puff cheeks out*


I don't usually believe in such stuffs, but Wen says it really works. She said can see results in one week! Wah .. really huh. She said her bf asked her what happened to her butt ... it looked ... smaller? heh heh. come to think of it, it does ... a little ... hahah. Ssshhhh ... she doesn't know about my blog, so let's keep this a secret between you and me, okie? hahaha. And I think it does work ... I do feel .... slimmer? heh heh heh. I don't know, it's kinda complicated. Hmmm, let's see if it works for my mom. :)


In the beginning of the year, I told myself NOT to spend so much money. Half the year has gone by ... and damnit, I've been contradicting myself. The harder you work, the more money you earned, the more money you spend. *puffs cheeks out* ... I must keep myself more occupied! Borrowed two music books home from the library recently. I will! I must!! ... okie, not so ambitious ... I shall try ... to play the O mio babbino caro before I return the books. Though methinks I'm in danger of dumping the books on the floor and not touching them till the due date. As usual. :P The plan was to learn that piece and try to transpose it for the violin. Bloody ambitious plan. Perhaps if I listen to Joshua Bell more often, I'll feel inspired to do so. heh. The limbs doesn't follow the heart's desires. ;P ... is it better to listen to music and enjoy and love every bit of it, or is it better to learn to play the music you like? And get so bloody fed up with yourself because you play like shit and end up playing half-heartedly and getting demoralised about it? More contradictions ... heh .. gee, I love the titles! :P

Maybe I should go and trim my nails first then. :P


I thought they took away one class from me ... but I counted and counted and ... damn, it added the same. Just looked contorted. Damn ... *puffs cheeks out*

Maybe I should change the title of this post today to *puffing cheeks out* instead. heh

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