Monday, October 31, 2005

D day

Tomorrow is a holiday!

Thursday is another holiday!

hip hip hooray!! :)

*****
Sin is buying Hersley's chocolate fudge one bottle.

*smacks lips*

And I am thinking of getting this book. :P

Even after I just got this book.

:P~~

And I just bought one bar of Valrhona chocolate - the one with the orange peel. Wen says it's the latest. It sure tastes good!

:)

Is it meant to be?

"Maybe there's no one in this lifetime. I just can't be bothered to look anymore, or to take interest in anyone. I don't look beyond the moment anymore."


Sometimes I wonder why so many of my girlfriends are all single. Perhaps they like it that way, or perhaps they are simply too busy, or perhaps they feel the same way, or perhaps not. I do not really know if they are truely happy or sad or just bochup and perhaps they themselves do not know as well.

What would I have been liked if I went down the same path as well?

My circle of friends was so small, and once I would have felt despair of finding someone I was interested in and who was interested in me. It was only lukewarm at best, and none dashingly cute to fly me to the moon.

Yet, perhaps it seemed meant to be, for one came along. And the better you know him, the cuter he became, the sweeter it is, and wittisims and humourisms added colour to the image.

I have two theories. :P

To keep him close to your heart, feed him, love him and make him happy.

And it is not safe to stay too long in a boy-girl-friend relationship. Commitment is the key, and willingness to work together forever, and the belief in 'till death do us apart.

*shrug*

Once upon a time, I would just have thought and be depressed. I am glad that I had tried.

And life doesn't just stop there. It continues forever, sometimes every so tiring, sometimes ever so rewarding.

:)

Some things worth remembering

Band of Brothers.

What I like:
In Crossroads, when Capt. Winters charges out on his own to the enemy line and came face to face with a German soldier and shot him dead, and his troop did a 'turkey shoot' on all the fleeing Germans. They were SS toO! Wow.

In The Breaking Point, when Lt. Speirs charges out on his own right into the midst of the enemies and they were simply too stunned to shoot at him.

And he does look quite cute too. heh.

I love war movies. :)
I love reading books on wars and spies and such stuffs. :)

Now where was the book on WWII which I read half way last time? My interest waxes and wanes.

My favourite spy book is still The Spy who came in from the Cold. Now, where can I find it to read it again? Perhaps when the bookstore has a discount, I might buy it.

:)

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Inactivity

Procastination - Have not booked catering yet. Have not confirmed with friends on housewarming.

Mood - sian.

*sigh*

*****

Blading Saturday AND Sunday. hOp!hOp!hOp!hOp!
Grrrrr.

I wish I could too. *sigh*

Sometimes it feels like my life is over. When, if ever, would I be able to do such things again?

*hears prison doors closing*

***

What do I do nowadays? Holidays are looming, but there seems to be a stretch of monotonity. Cook, clean, wash, tidy. *sniff*

Perhaps I might go shopping, but what is there to buy?

Perhaps I might go someplace nice to eat, but I'm sick of food.

Perhaps I might go .... and where to, pray?

Mood: moody.

***

Perhaps I might try out some recipes, but who is there to eat?

Perhaps, oh perhaps perhaps perhaps.

What a horrid hot day today.

Please help

I need to get a water cushion. Does anyone know exactly where I can get one? Those kind you used to sit on.

I haven't been a good grand-daughter nowadays. Life simply catches up with you and it's hard when you see her only once a week or so when you go to parent's place. It's difficult when all she does is lie down all day, not knowing, not recognising, not speaking, and not doing anything. The mind is full of other matters, and you forgot that granny is still around.

I know I wish that her mind would be sound, but I guess that's an impossibility now. We just hope that her sufferings would be less, and that she's happy somehow or other. Granny is well taken care of, her heart is strong, just that her mind is gone.

The water bed stopped her from getting bed sores, but when my parents renovated the house, they had to put it away for a while. I'm looking for those small water cushions as a temporary measure but I don't seem to be able to find a place selling them. Mom always tell me things when I get there, and it can be rather exasperating cos what can I do when I'm there already?

So please drop me a message if you know exactly where I can get one. Esso kiosk doesn't help because there are so many of them, and the two I've been to didn't have them.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Oh shoot the commentor

Grrr ... here I am. trying to be friendly and comment ... and their comment program spammed my IP addy. *sniff*

So I was just going to say:

There are many shades of black, there's black with a tinge of blue, black with a tinge of purple, black with a tinge of green ... etc

But all guys only see them as black.

:P

So xena might be right eh?

And everytime when I commented to hubby: Look at that midnight blue car! Or ... look at that dark green car!!! And he'll say: It's black lah.

Online shopping?

I can't quite buy stuffs for myself so shopping online doesn't help much. But you know. fingers are itchy, and you're feeling happy and fuzzy and you want to buy stuffs for your love ones. :)

So there ...





Dear hubby thought the design was cute. I think so too. Would they make them laugh? :P

I am sooo tempted to get the pink one for him! Which colour is nice?

:)

Y A W N

Ze poor rabix fanz haz been banzed from commentinz. Muz be ze IP addrez. Hmmm. I get spam protection started when I post the comments. It iz so troublesome to email, have to open email program .... *mutter*

OH WELL ...

:P
***
Hubby told me once upon a time when he had to do a presentation, he put up his powerpoint notes and told the class: There, you can read them yourselves.

Imagine: then he folded his arms and stood one side and grinned.

DUH.

I always try to make sure my powerpoint presentation and notes given out are not the same. I hate printing the powerpoint slides and give it to them just like that. So my notes are just in point form, with blanks and many many exercises. It took time, I guess, but I had so many versions before that, so this year I was pretty happy with the quality of the stuffs I gave them.

*pats self on back*

:P

It definitely made sure they stayed awake and were on their toes.

So there it was yesterday morning that the good sir spoketh all verbatim, and I drooled onto the back of my hand.

*slurp*

I had read everything during the break you see. *unrepentent*

heh heh.

The cat's smile

It's raining cats and dogs. I hope it clears up soon, so that I can go shopping!! :)

I don't normally do it, but I'm getting old and bochup. And my tummy does feel rather queasy. Perhaps it's all the punching and kicking, perhaps it was the curry chicken my parents cook last night. Whatever, it gives me a good excuse. *bleah*

And of course dearest hubby gets to sleep just a little longer.

heh.

***
I don't really like to shop online. I need to feel, to touch, to smell, to try on, to pose. *bleah* :P Usually I don't buy, but ... it's all the things doing. heh.

***

I have to win this. Tell me I can win. I think I can win. I've thrown away too many not be try to win this.

Damn damn and triple damn.

***
I'm still considered spamming over at Xena's commentary. sheesh.

:P

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Just not it

Aiyoh ... so troublesome to email! Auntie ... your rabid fans have all become spamsiums. *mutter*

Anyway, the red lacy one. Definitely. :P

*****
Rain rain rain. Everyday. They can't finish the roof works. Damn.

*mutter*

****
Everywhere also jam. Took me more than one hour and a half to get down. Hubby was late too, and he dumped me in a bus-stop somewhere. *sniff sniff*

:P

I forgive him lah. Told him to do so cos of the bloody freak jam all the way down. *sigh* Fortunately, that bus-stop had a direct bus all the way to where I wanted to go. *whew* I remembered a long long time ago, hubby dropped me somewhere and in the end I had to change three buses to get to my destination!

There are simply no freaking taxis in the mornings.

***
And so it ended early, but I didn't feel like going home. Walking alone in town isn't very theraputic anymore. *sigh* There's nothing I could buy for myself. *sniff* Min was going for a movie, Wen didn't feel like dinner, and PM was on call. How unlucky could I get?

Yup, very unlucky. The yoga class which I wanted to attend was changed to Thursday. *mutter mutter mutter*

Oh well. The slightly good thing was that there was a class by my teacher. None too easy, but .... since I was there already and I was bored, and I was down, and I had nothing else to do ....

Damn damn damn. Now I feel damn fat. :(

I wonder how fat people can stand being fat. It's so hard to breathe, you pant so easily, you can't be nimble and quick, or flexible. You get tired easily, and you can't even bend forward. Duh.

I think I shall stick to swimming for a while. If it isn't too cold.

*sigh*

**
No more ice-cream. An acquaintance ordered McDonald's ice-cream, you know, the one with the chocolate fudge, and I practically drooled when she ate in front of me. *sniff sniff*

No more ice-cream. At least perhaps only once a week.

I had healthy fresh fruit juice instead. :P

*
I'm getting old. Some people are just sooo strange. So fastidious, and just so ... well, self-centered? rude? Hmm, I was a bit taken aback. Or maybe it's just me. I'm old.

*shrug*

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Different?

There are some things that I ought to be doing now, but I'm just lazing on the computer till dear hubby comes home.

What do I have to do?

Start picking up the stitches on my knitting. Somehow I'm more motivated when doing for someone else, but when it comes to my own, the urgency is gone. But it's quite annoying to have completed the fourth row and find an extra stitch on the needle! So I had to unpick and I'm taking a break.

Beargh.

Had been watching quite a lot of TV recently. Love those National Geographic, Animal World and Discovery channels. There's this one showing how wild cats are being brought up by hand. Cats like leopard cubs and whatever. They are all soo cute when they're small! These big and dangerous cats are just like kittens! It reminds me of those two kittens we picked up in the beginning of the year. How I wish I knew what to do then, they might have still been around. :(

And I have been watching war movies with dear hubby. Right now going through Band of Brothers. It's really very nice to cuddle up and watch together. And these shows are actually interesting! Had been watching stuffs on cars as well. I guess when one is married, one tends to learn and enjoy doing things one's partner likes. I never would have read or watch war stuffs on my own, or cars and racing for that matter.

:P

It's a whole process of learning and growing together and doing things together.

:)

*****
Have to cut down on eating ice-cream. Doc said that baby is going to get fat ... and dibetic, although I don't seem to be getting fat. hahah. Take iron tablets not ice-cream. Whoops. My blood count is a little too low, have to 'improve' on that situation before the next visit. Damn. Dearest hubby is going to get 'scolded' if he doesn't feed me with iron tablets. heh heh heh.

Oh well ...

In the morning

I think there's something wrong with my connections. I can't seem to post comments in Xena's blog or Re-mi's. *mutter* ...

Oh well.

School's coming to an end. Well, at least for the kids. But somehow, it seems soooo idle these few days! :P Maybe I shouldn't be saying that. :P And I'll be going for a course for the next few days. Yippeee, no kids!

***

Monday, October 24, 2005

Of dreams and wishes

My cosy little home is coming along beautifully. *beamz*

We got a few big plants in, and boy, they do make the place look different. We're also slowly doing up the terrace, and perhaps more plants there as well.

I wish I could ...
redo the whole kitchen. :P

I need to re-think the kitchen, spaces are not utilise too well. I'm sure the kitchen can look nicer than what it is. *sigh* And the service yard as well. I'm going to throw out some 'junk', don't care hubby. *humf* Guys never see untidiness as well. *humf*

Feel like going shopping to get nice table runner, and stuffs to make kitchen nicer.

Must think of ways to rearrange stuffs in the kitchen.

*humf*

Any ideas for a tiny kitchen?

*sniff sniff*

Saturday, October 22, 2005

What a night!

It is always a delight to hear from PM. When she called, it's like, Oh wow ... she called me! *beamz* And you feel happy. :)

Then after waiting forty-five minutes for her, you swear that the next time if she calls, you don't want to go out with her again.

Since her handphone died (again), and you had paged for her four times already, and there's not even a shadow of her.

Grrrrr.

But all else is again forgotten when she turns up, full of apologies and blurness, and being so like herself. She gets high on air. And you get high with her.

heh heh heh.

And we always had a nice time together. :) Whatever murderous thoughts you had before all dissipated, well, at least till the next time.

:P

I would have bladed with her if I could. She is my blading kaki, after dear hubby. Now that she has finished her exams, she would be more free to do stuffs I guess. I do so miss blading! Don't know if I can blade properly next time! *sigh* So she went blading all by herself. *sigh*

**
I remember Lin calling me to ice-skate with her once. *sigh* Have I ever ice-skated with Lin before? There was a period of time when I was so motivated that I would go ice-skating on my own. Sometimes I would grab a friend, but it was hard to find someone. None was quite keen on ice-skating. PM seems to prefer blading. I think I am slightly better at ice-skating than at blading, since I've done more skating than blading so far. :P And definitely much better at cycling than anything else! There was A whom I used to go EC to cycle with. And there was LY whom I would used to play badminton with. Those were the days. Your friends all slowly disappear and you stop doing all the nice stuffs together.

*sigh*

***
Anyway, dinner was pretty good. Originally she had craving for laksa, then she wanted lots of meat. I wonder who's the one with the condition. hahaha. So we had lots of meat. Too much in fact, I feel so bloated! Can't eat too much else I won't be able to drive! The best was the pineapples though. Very very sweet. :)

Driving down to EC at night was quite a challenge. I was worried about jams, but fortunately it was only heavy traffic at most. But the bloody road works diverted the straight road, and I found myself stuck in the middle lane and was forced to turn right instead of going straight. Straight would have gotten me to where I wanted. I made one quick round and got onto the other side of the road, but I couldn't make a U-turn! And I didn't want to go back into the jam. So no choice lah. It was stressful when you have to make split decisions. And I ended up going down an unfamiliar way.

And cannot really stop to look at map. So simply followed my instinct and try to turn left when I had a chance. Definitely went a big big round and finally ended up on the ECP. Saved!

It's a good thing I got a feel for which direction I'm in. heh. Ask hubby and he is totally clueless of where the direction of the sea is. :P hiaks.

***
PM told me YS paged her just to tell her that she had got swollen feet from some foot massage, and she paid a few hundred for acupuncture to cure her gastric pain. *rolls eyes* I guess we all need some sympathy now and then. :P

I guess last time YS would have called me to whine to me about that, but now that I think of it, I haven't returned her call since the last time. Whoops. *bleah*

Blogging can be quite bad. I would have been calling her if I had not been blogging. The habit of blogging has quite removed the desire to call people up to talk, when I can do all my monologue 'talking' in here. haha.

***
Neighbour's chihaha is quite cute. Is that how you spelt it? Whatever. Long haired one. Very very tame! Let me stroke and pat and has big big eyes. Cutsie little one! Quite plump too. heh.

Hubby asked me if I would like to have a dog of my own. No thanks! The hassle of taking care of one. I would have my hands full soon. Maybe one day when I'm old and retired, and don't have to work, do housework, take care of family and all that, when I have lots of time, then I might. For now, coming home from work is never really to rest, but to cook for hubby and clean up the place a bit. By then, you're just dead beat.

*****
Why is it that when you want to play a certain piece of music, you would never be able to find it? Looking for my piano score for Chopin's nocturne in C# minor. The last time I saw it, it was on the piano with the Tchaikovsky's pieces. Now it's gone. *sigh* That's what happen when you leave them as loose pieces, and when all those bloody contractors come in and touch your things.

*sniff*

Damn damn damn! I thought I could download again from the internet, but there is some problem with the typeset! BOO HOO HOO!!!!

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Panda's Diet

Today I am hungry.

I have lost almost 2kg over the last few days. I don't know how other people can put on about 10 to 12kgs. I swear I ate a lot. I wonder where all that has gone to.

I know I'm very fussy with my food. Right now, I feel like eating the delicious and sinful teochew mee pok (with pork lard) which can only be found at the market near my parent's place. :( No car to drive down leh. *sniff*

I do not go for low fat milk. I only take full cream milk. Everyday. Sometimes two glasses a day, one in powdered in the morning and fresh at night. I never say no to chicken skin or fish skin and I drool over the juicy beef fats. :P I love prawns and squids and all kinds of seafood. And cakes and ice-creams and all those sinful stuffs.

So why do I still feel like skin and bones today?

*sniff*

*****
Sometimes I wish I have a sister to hang out with, whom I can go and visit or who can come and visit me and cheer me up, and gossip with together. Like the neighbour. Who has gone to visit her sister, who just had her second kid too.

All I have is myself and my fish fingers, and I shall have to get a second glass of milk soon. I hope it isn't too soon drinking milk. We shall see...

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Day 3

Dear god,

I hate taking medicine. In pills I cannot swallow. In mixture it tastes so awful.

Why me.

Sob sob sob

:(

...

Hubby is soooo understanding. He immediately moves all his stuffs out from the toilet and refuses to use the one I'm using.

*sniff*

Guys are so unsympathetic. I called up mom to get her to cook for me later. And paged PM to get some sympathy. I guess I should really start taking the medicines. PM put it more nicely. Hubby has gotten sick of me.

*sniff*

The medicine tasted soooo awful. I need something to get it out of my mouth. Yeech.

Monday, October 17, 2005

Snippets of life

Overheard: I want a baby. If you don't want to have a baby with me, I will go and have a baby with another man!

wow.

heh heh

****
I ought to get my butt cracking and prepare for the long awaited housewarming. Hubby's friend said, what housewarming? More like housecooling! Then again, they haven't had theirs yet too. tsk tsk tsk. We are all procastinators, not by choice, really. It's just so damn hard and troublesome to plan for something like that. Seriously, just the thought of having to plan for who to come and whether they would turn up and to get the food and all that gives me the headache. We have written down the guest list, so it is now to contact them.

So do we invite them first or do we order the food first?

*bleah*

And the thought of so many people in our house doesn't exactly sit well on both of us. We two are solitary creatures. We don't like people invading our personal space. True, sometimes it can be fun meeting and catching up with friends, but most of the time, we would just prefer each other's company.

And both of us are neither good planners. We tend to do things on the spur of the moment.

:P

***
Dear hubby is a nice guy most of the time. But I'm sure you've heard of the saying, do not disturb the sleeping cat or be clawed by a tiger. Well, whatever, I made that up. heh :P So we called in the police to make a complain and have them investigate. Someone is going to be in for something.

I don't think it is awfully bad of us to do that. The last time it happened, they just brushed it off and told us to go ahead and make a police report. So we did. So there.

*shrug*

That said, I think hubby can be quite frightening at times. :P But I still love him. :) :) :)

***
My stomach isn't rumbling anymore. The volcano activity has stopped, thank goodness. But I seemed to be still burping natural gas.

*hic*

Sometimes dearest hubby gets annoyed with me when I fall sick and whine a lot and not wanting to take my medicine. Don't you know, women just want sympathy. But he's definitely learning.

:P

The friend's dog

Siberian Husky ....

Very handsome.

:)

Over-friendly, over-huge and over enthusiastic.

I wouldn't have minded, until he pawed me in my tummy. Ouch, that hurts. Perhaps next time. I gave him a pat though, and had to stay behind hubby after that.

:P

His friend said that once their alarm went off and they were at work. The police turned up to investigate. They saw Max at the garden and called the owner. Conversation went as such 'You are the owner? Your alarm went off. But everything should be all right. You have a huge fierce looking dog guarding your house.'

What the ...

Hmm, I think he looks more cute than fierce. :P

Having the runs

Title suggested by hubby.

It's not funny actually. 2nd day and 6 times already. I'm just sleeping until I've had a headache. So I've been told to do something else, like write my blog or play yahoo games. So there and perhaps I'll prepare something later.

*sigh*

***
Email to the director
S Zoological Gardens
Dear Sir,
I would like to know how much is the entry fee to bring my dog into the zoo.
Thanks you.
Yours sincerely.

There wasn't any reply to that. :P
It was her baby, so she didn't see why she couldn't bring him to the zoo.

heh heh

*****
I was rather impressed with the gas grill, and I've hinted that we might like to get one too. But dear hubby pointedly pointed out the negative demonstration which I had. which actually may or not be so. But I guess not, not yet.

Oh well.

He still loves and enjoys the type of food I'm cooking for him. :) I guess that is good enough.

:)

***
Apprehensive - aren't all women are when it comes to taking risks?

I would miss him even more with that kind of working hours he would do.

And so, as hard as he would be working, so too would I have to.

Pretty bad timing if you ask me, but when would the tide wait for man?

I do so hope things will be all right.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Friday again

Too soon ... it's another Friday.

Rainy, sleepy and dreamy Friday.
Quiet, tired and bloated Friday.
Cool, soft and slow Friday.
Fat, idle and heavy Friday.

It's a Friday, and I'm all worn out. I should be doing things around the house. Washing, ironing and some cleaning, but I'm moving adagio.

I had a nice massage again today. Fell deeply asleep and definitely drooled. You know, the therapist woke you up and you realised the towel by your mouth definitely felt wet. heh heh. It felt soooo good. :)

Bought my four tubs of ice-cream! :) And a special bottle of sake for hubby. Managed to get home before he left for work and gave him a huge special hug. Was planning to get home earlier and make a simple meal but it would had been too rushed and too stressed. Indulged in iced-mocha vanilla instead. :P

I'm starting to feel it. Sideways too. I guess the last lap would be fast. :P

*
Sneezed yesterday morning and slipped off the top stairs. Damn. Good thing I was holding on to the railings. Thump thump thump I went and sat on my butt. My palm hurts but otherwise it wasn't too bad. Poor babe must have had a shock and was being very wild the whole of yesterday. Doh!

We finally caught Corpse's Bride. I thought it was certainly very morbid and just a little touching. I don't exactly like it, cute, yes ... but hmm, seemed rather superficial. Bloke sure changed his mind rather quickly. Makes you wonder what his idea of love is. Rather disappointing ... not exactly romantic. But one would never expect Tim Burton to be romantic huh?

Did I mention I kind of like Johnny Depp? :) BUT ... only when he looks wierd. There was this movie on HBO, Once upon a time in Mexico, where he looks NORMAL, and boy, he sure looks NORMAL. He only looks GOOD when he looks WIERD. hahaha. :P Tim Burton sure likes to work with him.

:)

***
It seems rather strange that when you meet one friend, you suddenly meet lots of friends. Had dim sum lunch with Min this afternoon, bumped into YS at the taxi stand in the evening, and PM just called. wow.

*****
It was quite heartening to hear them sing with gusto and pride. And to hear the valadiction said with sincerity, humour and meaning. And they seemed to appreciate the words, and they were listening. Concert was short and sweet, everything was done not because it was for show, but it truely mattered. How really different.

And baby danced to the cheeky music. tsk tsk tsk.

Or maybe I was hungry. Sometimes I swear I can't quite tell when I'm hungry and the stomach is rumbling. Don't have much of an apetite at times. Skipped dinner last night because didn't feel like it. Perhaps it's also the mood swings.

*sigh*

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

The evening

PM has not an iota sense of time at all. We agreed to pick her up at 6.45pm at the MRT. At 6.45pm, when I paged her, she was only in Orchard. Good grief! What was she doing there?

Okie, so I got her to get me that Black Forrest Cake I so like. :P

And I told her to call me when she was going into the train, so that I can estimate the time I need to drive down to the station to pick her up. Can't park there what.

And I waited and waited, bought a couple of magazines, groceries, more sinful food ... and when I remembered to look at the time, I paged her.

She said she was reaching the station! Waah. Didn't I say to call when she was supposed to leave?! Oh well, she will have to wait for me then.

*rolls eyes*

***
She liked the tofu I cooked. heh heh heh.

Dearest hubby liked the tofu I cooked too.

:)

***
Someone needs to find PM a nice bf. Does anyone want to apply for that position? hahaa.

I can't believe she went all the way from the west to the north just to eat dim sum, then back to the west so that she can eat the cheesecake and orange juice at the McCafe ... Good grief!

*rolls eyes*

*****
Marking five classes only feels like a breeze. One last class to go. Hooray! :)

As compared to fourteen classes last time, when we mark by sections or questions. Five classes only! I'm still reeling from the easiness of it all! Five! 1 2 3 4 5!

heh heh heh.

And the best thing is that I who set the paper ensures that the marking of them is really easy. Just the flick of the wrist, really.

:P

Not my day

I waited half an hour but couldn't get the bread I wanted.

I went all the way down to get the tubs of ice-cream only to find that I need the coupons for the discount. And I couldn't find the coupons at home.

boo hoo! :(

And PM called me while I was on the way home asking me out for dinner.

*sob*

Today is definitely not my day.

*sniff sniff*

So here I am back home, without the bread I wanted, no tubs of ice-cream, and no dinner with PM.

*sigh*

Instead, I've asked her to come over since I'm going to cook dinner for hubby anyway, so hopefully she'll be here later. Maybe I can get her to swim with me. :P

Menu tonight was supposed to be only tofu and onion eggs. I may have to cook something more.

What?

Sian ah.

But it'll be nice to have some company at least tonight. Sometimes I do wish I have a close sister to hang out with, I guess PM will do. :)

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Random thoughts generated by overworking

And perhaps sometimes it's just asking (or not asking) questions that you already KNOW the answers to - but choose not to SEE.
~Xena


If one knows the answers to the questions, and the answers are BAD .... then it's time to move on!

True, it may be the toughest thing to want to SEE or it may be that one just wishes to cling on to something familiar or maybe for some other reasons only heaven knows, it really doesn't matter at the end. Life still goes on, whether it sucks big time, or you could just look at it from another angle and hey it isn't so bad actually.

Been there. Been blind. Been stupid.

One may wish to seek understanding, but others may wish to withhold that information. One may try very hard, but others may wish not to bother. One can always try and try and plead and find and ask and close the eyes, and if the other is just a piece of rock, in the end, one just hurt oneself badly. And in the end, it doesn't matter anymore, but to look elsewhere to find answers.

*shrug*

And perhaps to find someone who wants to answer the questions as much as you want to ask. :)

*****
You would think that they would have enough time to check through the answers and make sure there won't be any careless mistakes.

Noooo ... they'd rather do the extra question, and god knows what else.

Careless, careless, careless.

*rolls eyes*

****
It's strange how they made the same mistakes. Does that number really look like a four? Where's the four? Some more I purposely rewrite it dark dark to make it clearer. So many of them so cock-eyed.

Wierd

***
I've been kicked, punched and hammered upon vigourously for the past few days. Talk about abuse. tsk tsk. What would it be like next time?

:P

And we laughed ourselves silly again last night as we tried to be creative. Again.

heh heh.

**
I'm not sure I'm that keen to go for the free make-over. They would usually plaster the face with too thick a foundation, too much powder and too heavy a make-up.

Did I mention how the course was like?

It was quite interesting to find out about the latest fashion and all those makeup tips. Actually Wen and I went for it because of the voucher, and well ... the food. Cakes were good. heh heh. And we thought there was another voucher which would have been a bonus.

We weren't very impressed with their demo. In the first place, the 'volunteer' wasn't very pretty. :P I'm biased, I know .... but it's always a pleasure to look at a pretty face, or a cute guy for that matter. *bleah*

Then both of us agreed that the foundation used was too light. Even after they were going on about how important it was to choose the right shade, they themselves gave her a death mask. tsk tsk tsk.

Next, the blush was too pink. It made her looked .... awful. She was slightly chubby on the face (and person), and the blush didn't serve to narrow the face at all.

Eye-liner was supposed to bring out the eyes, but somehow it simply highlighted the fact that her eyes were small and beady, and her face too wide.

Her eyebrows weren't tamed, and filling it in made it even worse. *shudder*

Get the picture yet?

The hairstylist did a negative demonstration as well. Her hair was flat and straight, then it became flat and messy. Oh dear. I don't understand why he looked so pleased with his handiwork for.

And I don't understand why after the 'make-over' she sat straighter, smiled more and appeared more confident. Why why why are women so unconfident of themselves?

All in all, both of us felt that the make-over made her look 'old', more auntie, highlighted her 'bad' features, too pink and too mask-like.

But still, we are going down to get our free makeover. Talk about being cheapskate. hahaha.

But actually nowadays I rather prefer to have my face free of make-up. :P

Time capsule

Over the weekend, we went back to our parents' place and packed a few more things. I uncovered boxes of rubbish which I've kept when I was a kid. Letters from friends whilst in school, cards, presents etc. How quaint. Stuffs my parents gave me when I was little. Toys, dolls and many other niknacks. Each item tells a story, and brings back memories.

Like the beaded necklace my Grandma gave me. Perhaps it's even in fashion now! heh.

I found a photo of my Austrian pen-friend. We wrote for two years and eventually ran out of things to say. I remembered I stopped writing first, because I was becoming boring and repetitive. I wonder how she is now. That was like when we were nine or ten years old. How time flies! I still have some of the gifts she gave me, like the pretty bangle, and the little necklace which is now tarnished.

*
Dear hubby found his baby photos. He has always been telling me he was so cute when he was a kid, and now I've finally set my eyes upon them. Boy, he is definitely very cute! Such a happy smilling cheerful baby with lovely chubby cheeks! And that mischevious grin certainly melts hearts. :) My dearest hubby was such a cute baby!!! heh heh.

One day, we shall go through his photo albums together with his mom and listen to all the stories. :) Memories are the most important things in a person's life, and it's always good to recall the happy memories.

They drive away the dark clouds of depression. :)

***
Note to self: Must take more photos. Next time when we are old, it'll be lovely to sit back together and go through those photos.

:)

Sinful indulgence

Aka How to kill your throat.

So you ran out of chocolate ice-cream.

So you feel too lazy to go out and have dessert.

So you crave for something sweet.

What's the next best thing?

There's a tub of coffee ice-cream in the fridge. It was for hubby actually. He prefered coffee to chocolate, but he had been sick lately so the ice-cream doesn't move that fast.

But what choice do I have? Something is better than nothing eh?

So you add a generous dollop of nutella chocolate into your little bowl of ice-cream. Ahhhh ... heaven. :) Oh, and the last three fresh strawberries grew mould. *sob* Wait! It's not the end. Where is the strawberry jam? Aaaahhhhh ....

*smacks lips*

I think the strawberry jam was a little mistake. My throat.

*unrepentent*

:P

Monday, October 10, 2005

Hush a bye mountain

The root of the problem hadn't been poor communication...

... it had been an utter lack of understanding, of intentions. And an inability to sense their meaning.

We fear what we do not understand.

Why do we fear what we do not understand? Why do we not simply ask? Why do we not explain?

Isn't it so easy, just to ask?
Isn't it so easy, simply to explain?
Isn't it so easy, then to understand?

Why, instead, do people keep quiet and not ask, or when they asked, not wanting to answer, not wanting to explain, not wanting to share?

Perhaps it's not just lack of understanding, but not bothering or caring enough to want to ask and to find out, and not wishing to share and let the other person know how you truely feel.

Withhold information, not wanting to appear weak, knowledge is power, not caring enough, not wanting to care enough, not wanting to appear desperate or persistant, too easily to give up, not caring enough to tell, not caring enough to listen, not wanting to share, afraid of opening up, afraid of how others would think of you then ...

And hence the silence.

Wouldn't everyone be much happier if they are open about things, and for others not to be too judgemental or cruel?

Perhaps people just are. Selfish. And cruel.

But perhaps not.

*****
Silence can be comforting sometimes, when you just enjoy his company. The best part in our relationship is that we do not keep secrets from each other. I can just be myself, and he himself. We can be totally direct, honest and truthful. And love gives us patience, and tempers any unpleasanties with tack, humour and concern. Never to hurt, but to grow together.

:)

Big Meow!



adopt your own virtual pet!

Still hungry.

There are some times when I wish hubby doesn't have to work nights. Like today for example. Dinner was a lovely dish of chicken. My favourite kind. You boil the chicken first, then you chop it up and stir fry with lots of garlic, some rice wine and a little sauce. I killed two birds with one stone. You can use the chicken stock to make chicken soup of course! heh. The chopping part is a bit difficult without a proper chopper though. My palm hurts.

Now, where was I ... yeah, hubby has to go back to work in a while. I feel like having some dessert after dinner, some hot apple tart would be nice, and it would really be nice to be able to drive to town for dessert with dear hubby now.

Unfortunately.

*sigh*

And there's no one I can think of to ask to go and have dessert with me.

*sigh*

Perhaps I should go myself? Fifteen minutes to decide.

hmmm.

***
Doc says I don't seem to be putting on enough weight. Can't help it if I can't get fat, can I. Just that my bloody arms are becoming watery, what with not doing yoga. I should really get my butt down for yoga ... but, I'm LAZZZZZYYYYY. I should get my butt down to swim, but the water is COLD .... and I hate cold water. *sniff sniff* The best ever swimming pool I had ever encountered was the one at Chiva Som, Thailand, where they had an indoor heated swimming pool! Can you beat that? Of course I swam everyday then! heh heh. And there was hardly anyone at the pool too. All to myself! *beamz*

I'm still hungry and I've finished the chocolate ice-cream.

*bleah*

I wish I had some friends whom I can just ask them out to meet me when I seriously need some company.

Sunday, October 09, 2005

More random thoughts

Hubby is going to be back late today. All those annoying homo sapians turn up at the last minute. So inconsiderate and thoughtless. Poor hubby is still a little sick. He'll be hungry for sure. Everything is prepared. Just waiting for him to get back before I start steaming the fish and dumping the veges into the soup. :P Was planning to cook chicken too, but that seems to be too much food for lunch. There's only so much food one can cook for two.

Me, I always like variety. So I always ended up cooking too much. Nah ... I'll just leave the chicken for tonight.

Hungry ...

Still quite hungry, after eating that orange and mango. :P

*****
Bleach 52 is still not out yet this week. *twiddle thumbs*

Xena is going to be 3 in mid-November. Elmo is slightly over 3 years. They get along well, though Xena has a competitive streak and absolutely hates trailing behind Elmo when we bring both for walks. Elmo adores Xena and lets her have first go at the morning milk plate. (Or maybe he is just pa lao pao! Hahahaha!!!)


That reminds me of Wen's dogs. The older one is always a gentleman, always letting the younger female one bully him. tsk tsk tsk. And the young female one always want to be involved in everything and win everything. heh heh.

Wen goes to dog outings quite often. I wonder if their dogs do meet. :P

***

Random Thoughts

Whenever I go for my massages, I always end up drooling. It's the position lah. When you lie on your tummy or your side and you fall asleep because it was so shoik, you just can't help it when you start drooling, can you?

:)

If you don't drool, it's just not good enough.

heh heh

*****
I'm quite satisfied with this cleaning lady. She's quite a nice person and none too slow too. I guess perhaps I don't ask too much. The house is usually quite tidy, just dusty. I think it has to do with all those construction going on around the area. I thought I would be able to get a dust-free house, but I guess it doesn't work when one opens the windows wide open everyday.

***

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Work Stressed

I had to wake up very early this morning. But not to go blading. Oh how I missed the blading. Mostly the wind in the hair and the freedom of movement. The last time I bladed was with PM, and Min was on the bicycle. And before that it was with dear hubby and the falling down part.

*sigh*

If only I woke up early this morning to go blading!

But nooo, back to work on a Saturday morning for a long boring meeting. To be fair, it wasn't that boring, but some of them were pretty boring, especially after the tea-break. Well, it takes all kinds.

*****
I have this theory. I think most guys can't really take care of themselves properly! If left alone, they would be much neglected and might become like those homeless chaps you see on TV, living a day one after another, neglecting their personal hygiene and becoming sleep deprived and half-starved.

:P

Do you know of any single chaps who stank? They are probably living a life of their own, workaholics and basically not taking care of themselves. But if they are married, the wives would be taking care of them, or if they live with their caring mothers, the mama boy would also be well-taken care of by their loving mothers. Unless of course the chap is gay or a metrosexual. That's different.

*bleah*

***
So I came home to find poor dear hubby running a temperature, hungry and sick. It really sucks when there's no one to take care of you. I'm so glad we have each other. :)

I will have to make some nice hot herbal stuffs for him sometime. He seems to be catching quite a few things nowadays. It's the over-working. Life here is so tough. When can we ever just sit down and watch the sunset together? Or walk slowly down the beach hand-in-hand and look at the clouds floating by?

*sigh*

*****
Everyone should go get themselves a nice good massage. That really beats all that stress. It's soothing, it's relaxing, it makes you drool. Just gave dear hubby a rub on his back and shoulders, head and eyes to chase away all those aches and pains and now he's asleep. Hopefully he'll be well enough when he wakes up. :)

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Tum dee dee tum!

The sweetness of revenge:

When we first moved into our new home, the neighbour below us kept blasting his brand new stereo so loudly that our house shook. Literally. It wasn't very nice of him at all, was it? Sometimes pretty late at night too, and most of the weekends.

Last week, dear hubby finally fixed up his huge speakers, okie, the smaller set, since the big ones really got no space, and we tried out this one hell of a cd. On drums. For a while. We shook.

hiaks.

Fortunately for him, the drum cd didn't sound very good with the smaller set of speakers. Wait till we fix up the biggest ones then. heh heh.

So now, we shall play through all our cds. There are some of mine which I've never heard before. The stereo sounded beautiful with my classical music. And darling's jazz is beautiful at night.

:)

So now, all I want to do is to throw an ammonia stinkbomb down onto the balcony of the chap two floors down who smokes at the edge and pollutes my air.

***
Dear hubby is not very pleased with me right now. He's sitting at his nice cozy corner and giving me the glare.

Because earlier I begged and begged him to let me squeeze that tiny little pimple of his. It was sooo tempting, you know, a small little ripe one where the sap is peeking out just a little. My fingers sooo itchy! :P

And he finally relented after I promised and promised that I'll be very careful. It won't be like last time. I swear!

He was much truamatised after that.

whoops.

heh heh heh heh heh.

*****
And if Xena is wondering who in NUS is reading her ... I'm wondering who in IDA is reading me!! DUH. Am I being watched? *twilight zone music*

**
From the reports, baby has BIG feet, a big flat nose and a rather big head.

Oh dear.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

To nitpick

It's quite hard to continue to feel grouchy after reading Xena's latest post, where you can't help but grin from ear to ear at her fun and erotic night performance, and feel happy for her. Heh.

So should I continue to write what made me feel grouchy? It's just me being small-gased and petty and irritated with certain things that happen.

Okie, so I just wanna nit-pick. *bleah*

*
Hmmm .... *scratch head*

There were a few things that made me irritated and grouchy lately, and the thoughts kept running in my head. Had to expel them, you know ... but somehow I don't feel so grouchy as before I read Xena's blog. See, that's why I'm her rabid fan. Sometimes when you read something really interesting and inspiring, it makes you forget about your own irritation. :P

Then again, I shall write for what it's worth. :P

***
I have no idea which century and which city she has been living these past years. It's been a long time since I've heard from her. She called me the other night, and some of her remarks kinda irks me. It reminded me why I don't really like talking to her nowadays.

Like: Huh? You still have to work?
Hello. Of course I still have to work. People like me all work until they pooped. Unless there're complications. Talk about IQ. *rolls eyes*.

Like: Huh? You are in the train? Are you sure you can travel in the train?
*rolls eyes even more*
Of course I can travel in the train. Duh duh duh. What would I be doing in the train if I cannot travel in the train? Duh duh duh. If I'm not up to travelling in the train, then I would have taken a cab home. Duh duh duh.

Like: Your hubby should be driving you around! Get him to drive you around!!
*eyes rolls and hit sixes*
I hate it when people tells me what my hubby should be doing or not, or what I should be getting him to do for me. It's frankly none of their business. And it really annoys me. It makes it feel as if I have to defend him because of something which is of my own decision. I mean, hey .. you don't go around asking your friend, how come your husband never do this for you, or do that for you. Right? Talk about EQ. Duh.

So tell me, am I being nitpicking and petty? Or do I have a case to be slightly annoyed?

I wasn't even complaining! Here I was, happily taking the train home, after going for a relaxing facial, right after a super long and annoying meeting which was another cause for grouchiness ... where was I, happily taking the train home, to stop by hubby's place of work to wait for him to finish his busy busy day ... and there you called me, and making some inane remarks.

*mutter*

And you called not because you were wondering how I was, perhaps you were, but it was because you had a survey to do, and I obliged with it, because I was in a rather good mood that night.

Then I got irritated after that when my brain ran over the events.

:P

And it was kinda irritating when you woke me up at 6.15 am the next morning.

*bleah*

Perhaps my temper is just a little bit short nowadays.

*****
So I haven't returned the call yet. Till I feel less grouchy I guess. :P

*
The good news is that they moved them down to the ground floor. It was definitely tiring to climb up many many flights of stairs to the fourth floor every day times that like eight times a day.

*whew*

I don't think I was being very appreciative to you when you told me that earlier. My face seems to be quite frozen in a state of grouchiness lately, but somehow my heart lightened a little when you told me that. I'm sorry if I didn't smile at you and thanked you. In fact, I think I hardly smile at work nowadays, except to the kids, and only to the good ones.

*bleah*

I'm tired, my nose is perpetually blocked, and so are my ears.

*grumble*

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Sad

Chocolate ice-cream and fresh mangoes.

That's life.

That cheered me up a little.

*sigh*